Sunday, June 20, 2010

$1 Coffee, 7-Eleven, City

Sunday night at 9.30pm is a bad time to look for coffee in the city, but I figured Brunetti were the most likely to still be open. They weren't, so I walked back up Swanston St, and a few more late-night coffee options sprang up.
Golden Tower? Nahh. They may be open at least 22 hours per day, but the last hot beverage I saw them serve was a bit scary. It was about 3.00am. Yuri ordered a hot chocolate, and as the waiter walked away Kieran said "With a shot of rum!" The hot chocolate came out smelling downright medicinal.
"Sorry, what kind of rum is in there?"
A storm in a teacup. A dark 'n stormy one.
Next, I passed Starbucks. For ethical* reasons, I couldn't go there either.
Then 7-Eleven came up on the right. I remembered hearing on the radio that they now sell coffee for $1. That's the same amount of money I just gave to that guy who busks on theremin. He stopped playing briefly to thank me, then went back to thereming.
I knew that the $1 cup of coffee was something I had to try, if only to serve as a nice addition to the price-versus-quality theme that's dominating the blog at the moment.
Just in case you hadn't heard the price was now $1, they write it on the machine six times:

I pressed the espresso button. It started out promisingly:

However, the last three quarters of the shot seemed to be just hot water. I kept willing it to stop, wondering whether I should just yank the cup out before it was finished. But no, I wanted it to do what it came here to do. Pretty soon, I was left with this:

And the results? Terrible. So bitter, yet so weak. I'm not sure which part of it tasted like coffee. Do yourself a favour: take my word for it. You really do get what you pay for. You might think it's worth spending a dollar to see what it's like, but it's really not worth it. That money is better spent on the theremin busker, or the guy who made a steel drum out of a gas bottle.

* Did you know that every cent spent at Starbucks makes it less likely that they'll close all their Melbourne stores and leave us in peace?

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